In a Famine, My A$$ Could Feed Me for Weeks

Make no mistake. My arse has a plethora of healing powers. Ask anyone who knows me. It’s a magic a$$. It’s an epic shelf of protection, the very source of my earthly powers. Ha!! I joke, but it’s literally a fact that due to my “largess” in the hindquarters region, I would outlive lots of people in a famine. I might even outlive the famine. Fat is a good thing. It nourishes, protects, heals, heats, and feeds. It’s necessary to life. We all have it.lizzys_tush

People often talk about the unhealthiness of being fat, but rarely do you see reports of the good that being a chunky-monkey can do for one in this world of ours. Well, I’m here to set the record straight (or, curvy as the case so clearly is for so many of us). Following are three pluses of being…well, plus.

one

Fat is actually healthy and being overweight leads to longer life for lots and lots of people. Being overweight is even cited as a boon for fertility, better skin, calmer dispositions, stronger bones, and sounder minds. Despite rampant reports that being fat equals automatic heart disease, high blood pressure, and diabetes, it’s simply not true for lots of people. Studies are coming out all of the time that disprove the “Fat is Always Bad” prejudice.

Unfortunately, what we have in this country is a media monster. This monster spreads misinformation so pervasively and so routinely that few people ever take the time to question, let alone challenge the assertions being made by these misinformed souls. One of the falsities that the media perpetuates is that being fat is universally bad or will lead to bad things down the road. Not true.

We all know that life is much more complex than soundbites and selling news would have us believe, isn’t it? There are way more nuances across the wide spectrum called human health than these media monsters portray. I encourage you all to dig a little deeper. Like anything in life, there are extremes at either end of a particular spectrum. And, unfortunately, these extremes are the most cited as, Du-Du-Dum! Evidence by the media monster.

But, most of us are in the middle somewhere and we know that “the middle” does not sell newspapers, television shows, or magazines. Yes, some people who are fat suffer from the results of that bodily state, but fat does not automatically equal unhealthy and sad, nor does thin automatically equal healthy and happy.

It takes all kinds of shapes, sizes, and experiences to be human and we all have a relevance to the human collective. Bodies are merely vehicles for the exploration of spirit. Your body is the way it is for a reason. If your body didn’t need to be fat or thin, it wouldn’t be. So. There. You’re free. Go forth in your new-found freedom, forget the size of your body, move into soul, find ways to be healthier every day, and be the bad-ass human you came here to be. We’re counting on you.

twoI’ve talked about this before in other posts, but being plus size is an invisibility cloak.  You can get away with alot of shi*t as a fat person. I test this all of the time and it always makes me laugh. As big as I am, I can get in and out of places without ever being seen. It’s the coolest phenomena. I literally walk right past people who, because of what I can only guess are their own prejudices and general insecurity about their body size, do not see me. And, this, my friends, comes in really, really handy. For example, when wanting to merely run into a store and grab something quick without a long, protracted discussion or “connection” with someone, being fat is awesome. It’s freedom. People don’t look at me. And, you know what, that’s okay. I actually like stealth mode.

No fighting to be seen. No more getting other people to validate me or even acknowledge my existence. I get to practice being enough for myself, break the dependency between myself and others, and push deeper into my own psyche, my own healing. It’s liberating.

So. If you’re fat, try to have some fun with it. Know that you are broadcasting an energy beam around the issue and if you look for disapproval in the world, you will find it. If you instead look for ways to validate yourself every day, eventually you will have self-esteem and you will manifest approval from the world in lots of ways. If you can, try to laugh as much as possible and know that other people do not matter one little eensy bit. It’s YOUR opinion that counts. Be stealth. And, giggle. Alot.

threeIf we are totally, totally honest with ourselves and we dig past the societal biases that we’ve maybe absorbed about fat, I bet more than a few of us would be very surprised to realize that we actually like a little cushioning versus bones or rock-hard muscle. Fat is very, very comforting. It’s silly; it jiggles and wiggles. It’s fun to grab and poke and handle. Fat is pleasing to us psychologically because it’s about nurturing; it’s about the mama, being held, being warm, and gently soothed. Fat is comfortable, encircling, engulfing, and just a delightful, never-ending softness. Fat definitely broadcasts a message of fertility, abundance, and pleasure.

This fat phobia of ours is a very recent cultural phenom. Up until the 1920s when the country was becoming enthralled with industry, being a bit fat was okay. Farm people were fatter. They needed to be to work the fields. Women were expected to be fat because they made babies. But, with the choke-hold of the industrial revolution, came the idolization of the “machine”, the “hard”, the “thin”, and along with it swept in the idolization of a thinner body type.

The thing is, world-wide, until modern times, fat has always been viewed as wealth, abundance, comfort, and something to celebrate. This fat phobia of ours is a modern construct. It’s time to be honest. If you don’t like fat, ask yourself why. Do a little digging around in your psyche. But, ask yourself if your ideas about body structure are truly your own or if you have absorbed the ideas from other people. Touch your fat and see what comes up for you. Journal about it. Ask and ask and ask. I bet you’ll be surprised by the journey. Oh, and READ THIS BOOK that I blogged about early on in the life of BBB. You gotta read this book; it will change your ideas about Fat. Guaranteed.

There are many more very real, life-affirming benefits of being fat, but ultimately, this blog is not advocating that people become fat. I’m advocating for the journey toward self-esteem, regardless of how you look or what your bodily conditions are. I’m advocating for self-acceptance because I want us, as a species, to accept others, expand our consciousness, and become healthy. I want us all to be well-fed, happy, and taking responsibility. I want us to own our power, be a force of good on this earth, and love. I want us to love. Even our fat.

 

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25 thoughts on “In a Famine, My A$$ Could Feed Me for Weeks

  1. The (Gluten-Free!) Food Gurly

    I would certainly outlive a famine! I have enough a$$ for two! Maybe more!?! I kid, I jest…. Or do I? Ha! I am not interested in being some blow hole’s idea of perfect. I am simply trying to become the healthiest, best me I can be. And I know this ain’t it! I love your outlook on things, man if only everyone could be that comfortable in their own skin… What a wonderful gift. You rock, Lizzy!! Much love sister!! xoxo

    Reply
    1. BigLizzy Post author

      J-baby!! Hahahahaaa…You are cracking (get it?!) me up, sis!! YOU are the one who rocks! I’m just holding up my end of the bargain over here. But, I write this blog for YOU anyway, my sweet soulful-food-sister! I just want to know that I made you smile and sing in your heart a little. I love you, friend. I know that seems weird given that we’ve never met in the physical, BUT your signal is strong and I get it; I get YOU completely and I love what I get from you. XOXO

      Reply
      1. The (Gluten-Free!) Food Gurly

        Smiling and singing 🎶 for sure, my friend. You have no idea what a blessing you are to me!! We are soul sister, you and I!! xoxo

      2. BigLizzy Post author

        Awwwwww…the best day ever. I made my J-babe smile and sing. Hooraaay! My work here is done! Ha! You are an equal blessing to me, sweetie. I mean it. The work you do to help people nourish themselves is standing shoulder-to-shoulder with my work. It’s how we love the world and give back. You bless me so, so much and the best part is that we found each other and can connect like we do and then spread the love, babe. It’s so, so vital and wonderful. I love you, Joanna.

  2. Becki Smith

    Lizzie, I love this article. You know why!!! I wish you had known Danne years and years ago! You have so much wisdom, and the beautiful words and wit to share it with us! Love you, My Sister.

    Reply
    1. BigLizzy Post author

      Becki-baby!!
      Awww…my sweet friend! Thank you so much for coming by and reading this post, leaving your thoughts, and sharing your lovely, lovely daughter with me in spirit. I just adore you, your huge open heart, your amazing soul, and our friendship so much. I cannot even tell you in words how much you mean to me, sweetie and how much you add to my life. Just knowing that I get to hang out with you all weekend is making me giddy with joy. I love you, friend. SO, SOOO much. XOXO ❤

      Reply
  3. momcloset

    So many interesting ideas here to talk about. On a personal level, I find your summary of point 2 disturbing because I don’t think most people would see being “invisible” as an advantage but rather interpret it as a lack of visual currency. Do you believe that being big alone makes a person invisible? Could other aspects of one’s personal image come into play on this one?

    Point 3 is the most exciting to talk about. Despite dominant culture, social conditioning and even body shaming, there will always be people who prefer chubbier, rounder bodies (both for others and themselves). I find that very cool and liberating. We can only be conditioned to a certain extent; there are always alternative views and subversive tides.

    I like your blog concept. These are important issues to talk about. I look forward to future posts.

    Reply
    1. BigLizzy Post author

      Hi, momcloset-darlin’! Welcome to BBB and thanks so much for your visit and intelligent comments. 🙂

      Really, point number two was my tongue-in-cheek way of turning a touchy issue into a positive. It’s totally about how I re-framed the phenomenon for myself. But, I agree with you, there are other aspects of one’s image that could come into play here. I also happen to be middle-aged and almost entirely silver-haired. So, age is another way of being invisible in a culture that adores and glorifies youth. No, I do not believe that being big is the only thing that makes people invisible. But, this blog is about body image and written from the perspective of a big woman.

      Anyway, there are just tons of ways that people marginalize each other. I was being cheeky and trying to say that our attitude is everything. Let’s make the best of it and find a well of acceptance, humor, and fun inside of ourselves. It doesn’t matter what other people do, think, say, or believe. If one finds a way to re-frame it, derive humor from the situation, and learn self-acceptance, other people’s behaviors matter less and less.

      Hope I explained that a bit better. Thanks for reading and leaving your pointed and thought-provoking comments. :)Big hugs, Lizzy

      Reply
  4. Sharlea

    I recently discovered stealth mode and it is pretty awesome. No drama, no bullshit, just as much or as little spotlight as you want … and, I don’t require a fraction of the attention that I thought I needed when I was younger! 🙂 That is quite comforting.

    Reply
    1. BigLizzy Post author

      Sharlea, LOVE this, baby-girl! You totally get it! I love stealth mode. It’s just so frickken refreshing, am I right? Gawd, the hours I wasted in my youth trying to impress others, gain their favor, get their validation, and make them like me. Ha! I’m free now, sis. It’s lovely. And, the fact that you are also here in this place with it just makes me smile so massively right now. I love it! You go girl! XOXO

      Reply
      1. Sharlea

        It just occurred to me that at I changed my it’s since I last commented on your site. I’m Fresh Ginger. I changed a bunch of stuff. Sharlea is my real actual name. No stealth mode there. Ha!

      2. BigLizzy Post author

        Ha, that’s cool! I *thought* it was you, Fresh Ginger, because of your avatar photo. But, yeah, it’s so nice to know your real name and what a gorgeous name you have, mama. Thanks for coming out of stealth mode for me here. 🙂 XOXO

    1. BigLizzy Post author

      FRANCES-baby! Sweetie, I had no idea. That is AWESOME!! Woot-woot! Congratualtions to your gorge daughter and YOU! Such a wonderful, wonderful thing when we realize that our bodies are not the enemy but the ally! Just makes me swoon with happiness. I love hearing this, my friend. I’ve missed you! ❤

      Reply
    1. BigLizzy Post author

      Hahahahahahaahahaha!!! I wanna squeeze ’em then. I bet they are the most beautiful thighs in the history of legs. 🙂 They’re on you. They have to be. XOXO

      Reply
  5. mariner2mother

    I am becoming more and more comfortable in my own skin all the time. And these days when I see my naked self in the mirror, I admire and appreciate my zaftig bod for all it’s done for me and how changeable and resilient it is. One thing that has helped me feel good about my body has been having a child who loves me and my bod. He snuggles up next to it and loves to grab onto and snuggle up with my flabby upper arm. He strokes my soft skin on the back of my upper arm and is comforted by it. How can you not feel great about yourself (bat wings and all) with that sort of validation?

    Beautiful piece my dear Lizzy!

    Reply
    1. BigLizzy Post author

      Susan-baby-girl!

      Love, love, love these comments and feel exactly like you do. Much more comfy in my own skin these days. I just LOVE the image of your son stroking the skin on your arm and appreciating his mama. It reminds me of my Shelby-girl. She used to grab my “butter”, which is what we called our bellies. She would squeeze my tummy and poke at it and say the cutest little things to me. She would actually talk to my butter and say stuff like ” How are you my mama’s butter? Are you happy today? I think you’re happy! Look at you!” OhmaGod. LOVE this so much. I loved those soft little moments.

      So, the image of your son being so sweet with you just enthralls me, my darling friend. I’m in love with your kid and YOU!!! Bat wings!!! Hahahahahahahahaa!!! F*ck yeah, girl!
      😀

      Reply
  6. MELewis

    Great post, Lizzy! (Have missed you lately!!!) I live in a very fat-unfriendly land here in France which makes your perspective all the more welcome. You celebrate your size and I love that. And I do agree that there is fat and fat: that is, people who wear it well, who are healthy and happy in their bodies, ‘Bien dans sa peau’ as we say in French (‘Good in their skin’). And there are fat people who look like they’re drowning in themselves. Just as there are thin people who radiate wellness and others who are clearly unwell. I’m somewhere in between, struggling daily with the body-image thing, trying to live well and be healthy. Your posts inspire me to live with generosity and joy regardless of size. 🙂

    Reply
    1. BigLizzy Post author

      Mel!! My darling little Frenchy-babe! So nice to hear from you, honey. Bien dans sa peau. Mmm…this is my new favorite French phrase. I LOVE it! I agree with you 110%. Fat that isn’t healthy is not agreeable or attractive, nor is unhealthy thin; as you mention, there are lots of variants. I think as we age, we tend toward more acceptance of the self and hopefully others. At least, I’ve noticed this in myself. You are a beautiful woman, Mel, truly. The best part is that you radiate beauty inside and out. I understand the struggle you have, I do. I still struggle sometimes myself, but we have each other and multitudes of support, both seen and unseen. It’s wonderful to know this. You, mon ami, are a light and a love and I’m so, so grateful that I have this connection with you, your work, your blog, your brilliance. Bises!

      Reply
  7. TIND

    As an absurdly energetic and healthy woman of girth I can’t say any of your points here were new to me, but I did have a lovely time reading them! I’m not a stealth-mode person myself, but I applaud your attitude and think this is all just splendid!

    Reply
    1. BigLizzy Post author

      Awww…TIND, a new friend with whom to play! Yay!

      TY so much for stopping by, leaving your comments, and giving me a huge smile over here. LOVE your attitude, sis and love how you describe yourself. You are awesome. I can tell. I’m headed to your blog asap.

      Anyway, you’re right: none of what I’m preachin’ is “new”, but like you say, it’s fun to explore it all. 🙂

      Thanks for the ray of sunshine, darlin’. You are always welcome here. Big, warm hugs, Lizzy

      Reply
  8. LB

    #2 was tough to read and your response to Momcloset excellent. If society glorifies the young and the pretty, then the rest of are being marginalize! UGH!!!
    By the way, I tell my heavier patients that their risk for osteoporosis is decreased!

    Reply
    1. BigLizzy Post author

      Hi, LB, my biker sista! Thanks for coming over and giving a read and commenting, honey! I always strive to understand what a person is actually saying and listen to them, even if I happen to be fielding their disdain or judgement or if I disagree. I’m not always successful at it, but this is the importance of communication and I at least owe it to someone who has taken their time to read my words and extend themselves.:) So help me understand what was hard about point number 2, because it has triggered a few people. I’m curious about how you were feeling while reading this and what came up for you. ❤ you! I love that you tell your heavy patients that. 🙂

      Reply

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